From 1 Bedroom Flat to Nearly 8 Figures and the Wealth Mindset Behind It [ep. #11]

Most people think building a wealth mindset starts with what you spend. The restaurants you book, the hotels you stay in, the environments you put yourself in to feel wealthy before you are. I thought differently. And 16 years later, my husband and I have built a nearly 8 figure net worth from a one bedroom flat, two comprehensive school educations, and a series of very specific internal shifts that had nothing to do with performing success.

This is not a story about overnight results or inherited advantage. It is a story about the thinking behind real, compounding wealth. The kind that builds quietly in the background while most people are busy faking an abundance mindset they have not yet earned the internal foundations for.

In this episode of Rich Work, I share the real messy middle. The boyfriend who moved out over the weekend and took the furniture. The moment I stopped asking "can I afford this" and started asking something completely different. And the 3 wealth mindset shifts that I believe have compounded into everything my husband and I have built since.

If you have ever felt like you are doing the right things with money but something is still not clicking, this is the episode that will tell you why. And if you have never thought seriously about how to build wealth in a way that lasts, this is where to start.
 

The Question That Changed Everything

I was 22 when my boyfriend moved out over the weekend. He took the furniture and left me with the rent. I went back to my parents with no plan, no savings, and no clear sense of what came next.

Most people would frame that as a setback. I frame it as the moment everything shifted.

Not because something dramatic happened in the weeks that followed. But because that moment forced me to get very clear, very quickly, about what I never wanted to feel again. I never wanted to be in a position where I did not have choice. And that clarity became the foundation of every financial decision I have made since.

The question I stopped asking was "can I afford this." It is the question most of us default to. It feels responsible. It feels like the right kind of financial thinking. But it is actually the wrong question entirely, because it keeps your focus on scarcity rather than on what needs to be true for a decision to be right.

The question I replaced it with is one I still use today. What matters here is understanding why the question itself matters. The way you frame a financial decision shapes the kind of thinking you bring to it. Ask the wrong question and you will get a small, fearful answer. Ask the right one and you open up a completely different kind of thinking.

This is what I mean when I talk about how to build wealth from the inside out. It is not about the numbers first. It is about the internal framework you bring to the numbers.
 

Why Your Wealth Mindset Has Nothing to Do With How Much You Spend

There is a version of wealth building advice that tells you to spend your way into a wealth mindset. Book the expensive hotel. Order the lobster. Sit in first class. Surround yourself with expensive things and your brain will catch up with the life you are trying to build.

I disagree. Firmly.

I talk in this episode about a specific example I came across online. Someone suggesting that booking an expensive dinner, one where the lobster alone costs more than most people spend on a weekly shop, is the way to expand your thinking around money. The idea being that discomfort with the price tag is what you are working through. That sitting with that discomfort trains your nervous system to handle wealth.

My response is direct. If you have not done the internal work first, sitting in an expensive restaurant does not expand you. It contracts you. You spend the whole meal doing the maths in your head, calculating what this means for your month, wondering whether you can justify it. That is not a strong money mindset. That is anxiety with a side of lobster.

My argument is that the conditions have to come before the spending. You do not spend your way into the right thinking. You build the thinking first, and then the spending becomes an expression of where you already are rather than an attempt to get there.

This is a distinction that sounds simple but is genuinely profound when you sit with it. Most people are trying to use external experiences to create internal shifts. I am saying the internal shift has to come first. And I'm going to explain exactly what building those internal conditions looks like in practice, and why getting this the wrong way round is what keeps most people stuck regardless of how much they earn.
 

The 3 Wealth Mindset Shifts That Compound Into Real Money

I do not call these tips or strategies. I call them shifts. Because they are not things you do once and tick off a list. They are ways of thinking that, once embedded, compound quietly in the background of every financial decision you make.

 

1. Setting the Conditions Before You Spend Anything

The first shift is about replacing the question "can I afford this" with a better one. I am deliberately specific about what that question is in the episode, but the principle is this. Every significant financial decision should be preceded by a set of conditions that you have thought through in advance. Not in the moment, not at the restaurant table, not when the invoice lands. Before.

This is what separates reactive financial behaviour from intentional wealth building. And it is something my husband and I have done consistently since the very beginning, even when the amounts involved were small.

 

2. The People You Think With

The second shift is one I describe as the most overlooked investment most people make. Not stocks. Not property. Not ISAs. The people you do your thinking with.

The conversations my husband and I have had over 16 years. The way those conversations have shaped not just our financial decisions but the quality of our thinking around money. And why most people are having entirely the wrong conversations, either avoiding money talk altogether or having conversations that keep them small.

A real abundance mindset, I would argue, is not built in isolation. It is built in the quality of the thinking you do with the right people around you. And most people have never been intentional about this at all.
 

3. Building the Internal Resilience to Hold It

The third shift is the one that surprises people most. Because it has nothing to do with making money and everything to do with keeping it.

I describe a pattern I have observed repeatedly. People do the work, take the action, make the money. And then contract. They pull back, spend it, self-sabotage, or simply stop doing the things that worked. Not because the strategy failed. Because internally they were not yet built to hold what they had created.

This is what I mean when I talk about expanding to hold the money. Your relationship with money has to grow alongside your net worth. Otherwise the money finds its way back out, one way or another.

This shift is the one most people skip entirely. And it is the one that, without it, makes everything else temporary.
 

Key Takeaways

  • A genuine wealth mindset is built on internal conditions, not external spending. Putting yourself in expensive environments before doing the internal work first creates anxiety, not expansion.

 

  • Your relationship with money has to grow alongside your income and net worth. Without building the internal resilience to hold wealth, most people unconsciously contract after every financial leap forward.

 

  • The people you do your thinking with are one of the most important and most overlooked investments you will make. Intentional, expansive conversations about money compound over time just as surely as any financial asset.
     

FAQ

What is a wealth mindset?

A wealth mindset is a way of thinking about money that focuses on building the internal conditions for wealth rather than reacting to financial circumstances. It involves asking better questions before financial decisions, building resilience to hold wealth once created, and being intentional about who you think with and what you talk about. It is less about what you spend and more about the framework you bring to every financial choice you make.

 

How do you build a wealth mindset?

Building a wealth mindset starts with three internal shifts. First, replacing reactive financial questions with intentional ones you have thought through in advance. Second, being deliberate about the people you do your thinking with and the quality of the financial conversations you have. Third, building the internal resilience to hold wealth once you create it. Without all three, most people find that external financial results remain temporary regardless of how hard they work.

 

What is the difference between a wealth mindset and an abundance mindset?

A wealth mindset is grounded in specific internal conditions, intentional thinking, and resilience built over time. An abundance mindset, as it is often taught, can become a form of performance, spending on expensive experiences or repeating positive affirmations without doing the deeper internal work first. The real difference is that true abundance is a result of the conditions you build, not a feeling you perform your way into.

 

Transcript

[00:00:00] The biggest investment you can make is the people you do your thinking with and what you choose to talk about. My husband and I have always prioritised time together to think expansively. That sounds strange because it makes it sound like we are sat down going, "So what's our 5-year vision?" We don't consciously sit down with a checklist we are working through, but we do have boundaries and we dedicate time to this.

Welcome to Rich Work, the podcast for established female entrepreneurs ready to turn their expertise into premium clients and consistent high-ticket revenue. I'm Rachel Pearson, global brand and business strategist, skincare obsessed and always distracted by booking the next mini break. Here you will learn how to position like a luxury brand, attract clients who love to invest, and build something that actually lasts, so you can create the business and life you want, not someone else's version of success. This is where premium positioning and building wealth meet for women who are rewriting the rules. Let's get into it.

[00:01:05] Today's episode is different. It is not about strategy or anything directly to do with business, but it is also the thing that is going to make you the most money in your business and make your strategy work for you.

Today I am sharing a personal take on how I have built wealth through the way that I think. This is not manifestation in the traditional sense, or the way you may have heard about it before. It is about a belief system that I hold that may inspire you to think differently about the way you approach money and the way you build money into wealth.

There is no right or wrong way to build wealth because wealth means very different things to different people, as I have talked about in a previous episode. But my intention today is that you hear how I think about my own wealth, which is something I do not feel is talked about enough.

[00:01:59] Often we are told about what has happened as a ta-da moment. This is the result, this is what I have got, and then the before of where somebody used to be. But the thing that will shift the way you think and inspire you to do something differently is that messy middle in between.

So today I am showing up as someone you may know as a business strategist, as somebody who is quite geeky about the details. But also someone led by a belief system, energy, perception and intuition, following what I think is a thread, and sometimes it does not make sense to me. What I share today is not meant to be a neat, logical sequence where suddenly everything fell into place. The threads I followed in my own life have enabled me to create things I honestly never imagined I would create.

[00:03:17] I am a business strategist, but I am also a woman, a wife, a mother, a friend, a daughter, a sister, and someone who has built alongside my husband. I am really transparent about that. It is not just me talking about building my own wealth, but I am not sat here piggybacking on the back of his wealth either. I have built together with my husband from a place of comfort to a place of freedom and genuine wealth.

From Comprehensive School to an 8-Figure Net Worth

We Both Went to a Comprehensive School. Here Is Where We Are Now.

[00:03:41] To give you some context, I have never come from a place of extreme wealth, and I am very honest about that. I do not have a rags-to-riches story. I came from a really stable background. My parents are still together, my family is very close, and I had a financially stable childhood. I came from that place.

[00:04:30] My husband and I both went to the same school. We did not know each other at the time, but years later we discovered we had both attended the same comprehensive. Not a private school. My boys are both in private school now, and I am not for or against either, but this is my story. We went to a very regular, large school. There was a lot going on there that was not great, but it also gave me a friendship group I still have to this day.

[00:05:12] We did not come from anything close to extraordinary wealth. In the 16 years we have been together, we have built a net worth value approaching 8 figures. That covers our properties, investments, and cash. I am talking about our whole portfolio. Together, we are also cash millionaires, and I say that directly because in order for me to talk about this, you need to trust that I know how it has been built.

[00:06:03] Everyone has the opportunity to think about money strategically and develop a wealth mindset. What people are perhaps not thinking about is who you have to become in order for this to happen. We have been married for 10 years and together for 16. When we met, we were nowhere near being millionaires. What I am sharing today is the compound effect of what has happened in a relatively short space of time.

A Wealth Mindset Is Not About Spending More Money

[00:06:26] This conversation, when I hear about how to build wealth or how to think in a more abundant way from people who have achieved a high level of wealth, always confuses me. A lot of the time it comes back to the same things: stepping into the lifestyle you want in your future now, rather than waiting for it to happen.

I am for that. I believe your environment hugely shifts and influences how you act. The rooms you put yourself in and the people you surround yourself with are massively important. But that is not enough on its own.

[00:07:33] I heard an example recently from someone I follow on Instagram who was sharing a book she had read. The takeaway she had was to do things that take you outside the comfort level of the money you are making right now. The example she gave was to go to a restaurant and order something at market price, where there is no set figure on the menu, just a price of the day. She went in, ordered off market price, and did it with the belief that the money would always come back.

[00:08:23] I do not think that that is how you build a genuine abundance mindset, because if you put yourself into an environment where you are buying expensive things, or in the online and coaching space, investing in a mastermind or a mentor that is way above what you are currently earning and you are putting it on a credit card and pulling in all your savings to do it, with the belief that the money will come back, the piece that is missing is that you have not yet built the internal resilience to trust that.

[00:09:00] So if you are sat in that restaurant eating the expensive lobster and what is going through your mind is, "I am not really enjoying this because I do not know how I am going to pay for it," that is not trusting in abundance. That is putting pressure on yourself because you have taken yourself outside your comfort level and dysregulated yourself around money, without building the inner resilience at the same time.

[00:09:34] On the one hand, I do agree with putting yourself in environments that are stretchy. I do that consciously, over and over again. I put myself in conversations where I feel like the smallest person in the room. I put myself in conversations where I do not understand the topic at all, but I am there to expand and to learn. I go to places that stretch how I think. But at the same time, I am doing the inner work around building the resilience to be able to hold it.

[00:10:16] I have not had money come in and spent it straight away. I have not landed an ideal client and then self-sabotaged by going straight back to selling my lowest-priced offer because I did not trust I could do it again. The thing I do not see people talking about, and what we are going into today, is that you have to expand to hold the money. You cannot just take the action, otherwise you will contract straight after it.

[00:10:43] The shift is not about what you spend, which is what the online space is very good at preaching. Spend more to make more. If you want a million-pound business, you need to invest at 300K. The amount is not the thing we should be focused on here. It is the conditions under which you operate that make that amount make sense.

[00:11:04] I have always approached my money, how I spend, how I invest, and how I build wealth, through the lens of choice. Not "can I afford this?" but "what needs to be true before I do this?" Those are fundamentally different questions. There have been times where I could absolutely afford something but I knew I was not in the right space, energetically or capacity-wise, to make the most of it. The conditions were not in place for me to expand with it. So even though I could technically afford it, I chose not to, because investing in an expensive mentorship programme I do not have the capacity to show up for fully is not a good investment, regardless of the price.

The Question That Changed My Relationship With Money at 22

Why I Refused to Move Back to London Until I Had a Year's Rent Saved

[00:12:31] Let me give you some examples of how I have thought about this. These will never be replicated exactly in your own life because this is my story, but hopefully they will shift the way you think about where you are right now, where you are putting your energy, and what questions you could be asking yourself that would enable your relationship with money and your relationship with wealth to look different.

[00:12:49] When I was in my early twenties, around 22 or 23, I had moved to London with my boyfriend at the time, who is very much not my husband, and it will become apparent why. We lived in West Hampstead, which was a fairly ambitious choice for a 22-year-old. My boyfriend had a job at a hedge fund. He was an analyst, not super senior, but making really good money straight out of university. I, on the other hand, had followed my heart and was working in marketing for the arts. I worked at Shakespeare's Globe Theatre in London and was assistant to the head of marketing at St Paul's Cathedral. Amazing experiences, terrible pay.

[00:13:37] Our relationship was not working. It was very clear. I went back to my parents for a weekend and came home to London to find he had moved out, taken the furniture, and left me with the remainder of the rent on that lease. Thankfully there were not many months left, but I had to use all my savings. My salary did not nearly cover what I needed, so I spent everything just to meet my commitments, and then moved back to my parents in Worcestershire.

[00:14:26] At 22 or 23, that was not the worst thing in the world, but it was a pivotal moment for me. It shaped how I started to think about money, and how I began to take accountability for the fact that I had not been thinking about my own money at all. I had been living with someone who earned well, contributing half the rent, and had nothing left over. I was not living the life I wanted.

[00:15:00] When I moved back to my parents I made a decision. I wanted to return to London, but I was not going to do it unless I had at least a year's worth of rent saved. I did not want to go back without having a choice. And that decision has shaped everything about how I think about money and wealth ever since. Wealth, for me, is not about how much money you have. It is about the choice that you have.

[00:15:54] I never wanted to be in a position where I could not choose where I lived, what job I went for, or the lifestyle I had. I did not have the financial means to do that yet, so I had to get creative. Saving a year's worth of London rent on my salary was going to take a long time.

[00:16:22] So I started to think differently. I needed some time to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, which at 22 is perfectly normal, but I also needed a plan. So I decided to apply for a scholarship. I researched everything I could. I had done an English degree and I was interested in where that could take me. I found a Master's in Publishing and Intellectual Property Law at UCL, a new qualification at the time, and I applied for the scholarship like my life depended on it. I spent hours on the application. I went out and did free work experience to strengthen my case. There was no way I was not getting that scholarship.

[00:17:26] It covered my tuition fees and came with a £10,000 grant towards rent in shared accommodation. I had my year's worth covered. I had the ability to move back to London on my own terms, and I did it.

[00:17:45] I would not have thought about doing a Master's if I had not shifted my thinking about the conditions under which I was willing to move forward. By deciding that money had to work differently for me, I completely changed the trajectory of my career and my business, because that degree opened doors I would not have had otherwise. That one decision made me more resourceful than any abundance exercise ever could. It is the start of what I now think of as wealthy thinking.

[00:18:34] I was not buying expensive dinners and hoping the universe would provide. I set the conditions under which I was willing to move forward, and then I got creative about how to make it happen.

I Maxed My ISA Before I Ever Bought a Designer Bag

[00:19:02] Back in London, Master's done, working in marketing, starting out in advertising and moving into innovation, I was in my mid to late twenties and I started to ask myself what I wanted my life to look like. Not in a materialistic sense, not a specific house or a specific car. I just knew I never wanted to have to question whether I could afford things. What that meant at 26 is very different to what it looks like now, but the principle has always been the same.

[00:19:28] When I started thinking about what choice looked like for me, I recognised that having choice over the standard of my life and the experiences I had was more important than any short-term materialistic purchase. I did not have any designer clothes until I was well into my thirties. I did not have a bag that was not from a high street brand for a very long time. The first designer bag I bought was when I was 34, and it was a small Mulberry. Not a Chanel, not a Birkin, a Mulberry. Still expensive, but not extraordinarily so.

[00:20:24] My priority early on was not to have materialistic things. It was to travel, to see things, to experience things that would continue to expand how I think. So instead of buying things that made me look like I was doing well, I started creating investment pots. From around 25 or 26, I would max out my ISA every year. I started learning about financial strategy, which was not a natural space for me at all.

[00:21:00] My degree was in English Literature. I had always been told at school that I was bad at numbers. I was in the top set for everything except Maths. I remember once getting 10% on a Maths test and going in with my mum to ask the teacher to please hand my paper back separately, not in front of the whole class, because I was so embarrassed. He said no.

[00:21:26] There have always been moments in my life where I felt terrible at numbers, and the truth is I am not. I am just not good at school Maths, which is the kind of Maths you rarely need. But I did not have a background in it and I did not believe I was capable of it, so shifting my money mindset around numbers was something I had to work on. I started educating myself around financial strategy and, rather than thinking I had to learn everything at once or do it all myself, I focused on knowing how to ask the right questions. That has always been central to how I operate. Asking better questions is a core part of how to build wealth, and it does not mean you have to put everything in place yourself.

[00:22:07] I started investing in small ways into stocks and shares, and then using the surplus to fund the experiences that actually mattered to me, which were travel and holidays.

[00:22:29] Something I realised when planning this episode, which I had never consciously connected before, is that this shared understanding, that experiences matter more than things, was something I connected with my husband on from our very first date. I met him at 26, right at the same time I had started thinking more carefully about financial strategy. On our third date he told me he was moving to Abu Dhabi. Instead of thinking, "well, that was nice," I said I would travel to make it work. He felt exactly the same. We did long distance for 18 months and I travelled regularly to see him.

[00:23:33] I could do that because I had already set the conditions. I had the financial freedom to travel. Do you see how things connect? If I had not set up those investment pots and got clear on my priorities, I would not have had the money to sustain that relationship when he moved to the Middle East. Time and again I have seen reality reflect back what I have already set the conditions for.

[00:24:00] I am not going to say material things do not matter to me at all. The house I am recording this in is 8 times bigger than the one we moved from. I have beautiful cars, designer clothes, a stylist I work with. I have a lot of beautiful things. But the foundation has always been to invest in what expands how I think, not in what makes me look like I have already arrived.

[00:24:53] Investing in what you think is the most important piece. That is why I will always talk about the rooms you get yourself into, the conversations you are part of, the environments you put yourself in, above and beyond the visible, surplus things. Going on a fancy retreat to be seen around successful people is only worth it if it genuinely expands your thinking and gives you great conversations. If it does not, it is not for you.

Expansive Conversations Are the Biggest Wealth Investment You Can Make

[00:25:45] The thing people do not talk about, because it sounds so simple, is this: the biggest investment you can make is the people you do your thinking with and what you choose to talk about. My husband and I have always prioritised time together to think expansively. That does not mean we sit down with a vision board checklist. We have no formal agenda. But we have boundaries and we dedicate time to it.

[00:26:08] When we first got together, we would go for a walk every Sunday afternoon into the evening, and sometimes those walks would go on for hours. There was no agenda. We just talked about what we wanted to build, what the future could look like. We had disagreements, but it was always bigger-picture thinking.

[00:26:30] Over time that has evolved. We have two young children now. We have more responsibilities and less time. But we still prioritise going out for dinner regularly, and the unspoken rule is that we do not talk about the children. I know that sounds unconventional because our children are our world. But we also do not talk about household logistics, whether we need a new shed, the small stuff. Those dinners are where we talk about when we want to move house, our investment strategy, where we are going next, what the next phase looks like, what matters to each of us individually.

How My Husband and I Talk About Money Now

[00:27:27] That has expanded into longer trips away together. We are going away in June for three nights to have these kinds of conversations, because at the stage our business and career are at now, with genuine surplus and high growth in both, those conversations have become more specific.

[00:27:47] Recently we were talking about our next house move. We have been in this house for six years and it was a significant step up, but the question is no longer "can we afford to move?" We have our retirement planning covered. Our boys' savings are locked in. The baseline is there. So now the conversation has moved to whether we are being aggressive enough with our high-risk investment strategy.

[00:28:24] My question back to him was that I feel we are not being aggressive enough given where we want to go next and what we want to be able to give back, to family, to friends. One of our main goals now is to have holiday homes and a life that brings other people in. To do more of that, we need to take bigger risks.

[00:29:02] This connects to something I heard on a podcast recently from a money expert talking about high net worth thinking and how to build wealth over time. He was making the point that a lot of couples spend their time on the small questions Iike "Do you really need that Starbucks every day?" You cut it, you save £3 a day, and a year later you have probably done nothing meaningful with that saving. Why spend energy on the small questions when the real question is what your investment strategy looks like? What would happen if you increased the percentage of your household income going into investments by just 1%? That is a completely different relationship with money and a completely different money mindset, and it is where that relationship starts to compound into real wealth.

[00:30:00] These are the conversations my husband and I have been having for years. And I hear you thinking it is easier now because we have more to work with. But we had these same conversations on those Sunday walks when we were living in a one-bedroom flat. We did not have the assets we have now, but we had the same thinking. That is the point.

How Your Money Mindset at Home Shows Up in Your Business

[00:30:25] The way you think about money in your personal life and the way you think about money in your business are not separate. The way that you manage that money does need to be separate. It is a very slippery slope to consistently pull from personal savings into your business. I have completely separate financial strategies for my personal life and my business. But the way I think about money is aligned across both.

[00:31:05] If you are operating from scarcity personally, restricting your spending, performing abundance while feeling terrified that money needs to come back to you, that energy will show up in your business. It will show up in how you price. It will show up in how you sell and how you respond when someone says no. It will show up in the offers you create and the clients you accept into your space.

[00:31:30] So I want you to get honest with yourself about whether you are genuinely asking questions that expand your thinking about wealth, in your personal life and in your business. Are you making choices from a place of clarity about what you want and what conditions need to be in place? In your personal life and in your business too. It is how you walk away from a client who is not the right fit. It is how you invest in your brand, your team, and your growth. Because sometimes you have the money to invest in something, but the right question is not "can I afford this?" It is "have I created the conditions to make the most of this?"

[00:32:43] A money mindset built on wealthy thinking is not about affirmations. It is not about buying luxury to feel abundant or investing big to play big. It is about the choices you make and the conditions you set. What you prioritise. What conversations you have and which ones you walk away from. Who you surround yourself with. What rooms you put yourself in. Whether you are expanding your thinking rather than investing in things to make you look successful.

[00:33:00] The question I will leave you with is this: are you putting yourself in expensive environments and hoping the feeling sticks, or are you building the conditions that make abundance inevitable? Those are two very different things, and in my experience the second one is the one that lasts. It is how you do not just make money. It is how you hold the wealth too.

[00:33:10] That is a bit of a different conversation for today. I would love to hear any takeaways you have from this. This is Rich Work and I will see you next week.

[00:33:29] Thanks for tuning in to Rich Work. I would love it if you left a review. It helps other women find us. In the meantime, follow me on Instagram at rachelpearson.co for a different take on premium positioning, one that is not about fitting a box. See you next week.